How Do You Find Your Purpose? Surrender, Spiritual Guidance & Discovering You Are Love with Swami Aniruddha

How do you find your life purpose — and what happens when you finally say yes to the path?

In this episode, Katische Haberfield interviews Swami Aniruddha about his search for meaning, the moment he asked for help, and how meeting his spiritual teacher changed the direction of his life.

We explore surrender, spiritual mentorship, devotion, and how the message “You are love” becomes real through discipline, humility, and lived experience — not theory.

Inside this episode:

• Searching for purpose and spiritual direction
• The courage to ask for guidance
• Meeting a teacher and recognising the path
• What surrender really means in spiritual growth
• The role of a Satguru
• Devotion and chanting as embodied love
• Love as identity, not emotion
• Living from the understanding that you are love

This episode is for listeners exploring purpose, spiritual guidance, devotional practice, and discovering love as the foundation of who they truly are.

Listen to the mantras mentioned by Swami Aniruddha: https://mantra.bhaktimarga.org/en-oceania

Work with Katische: Direct Transmission Session (Private)

Katische is a Direct Transmission Spiritual Channel bringing through the most appropriate authorised spiritual higher intelligence for your situation.

Transcript

0:00

Welcome to the Infinite Life Consciousness Raising Spiritual Transformation. I'm your host, Katische Haberfield. I know that this podcast will open your eyes to both the imaginable and the inexplicable. This podcast is not for beginners, but if you are on your spiritual awakening. Or if you have experienced many spiritual awakenings, you'll find content here to delight and to inspire. We cover everything from past life regression through to hypnotherapy sessions, exploring consciousness in forms such as Comet and in other dimensions. We speak to those in the afterlife. And also we rescue ghosts. We also speak to interesting and fascinating individuals, spiritual entrepreneurs and authors and poets as well. Thank you for joining me. I appreciate you supporting this indie podcast. Don't forget to follow us on Apple Podcasts and share with a friend. Thank you so much. Bless your heart. Bless your soul. Namaste.

Swami Aniruddha: 1:20

The more I asked, the more I got confused. He always answered, listen to your heart, gave an answer, and then listen to your heart. In the end, it was steam coming out from my ears because I couldn't understand anything anymore. I felt like my whole life I built on a lie and I walked out of the room and I was feeling so bad.

Katische Haberfield: 2:05

Welcome back to The Infinite Life with me, your host, Katische Haberfield. This week we are incredibly privileged to have with us Swami Aniruddha. Swami Aniruddha offers a grounded and practical approach to spirituality, where ancient wisdom meets real life transformation. For over 17 years, he has lived under the direct guidance of his guru Paramahamsa Vishwananda. I've said that last bit there, wrong  Vishwananda. serving in his ashram and sharing his message of divine love and inner awakening. Driven from childhood by the questions, who am I and why am I here? Swami Aniruddha explored many paths studying mechanics, philosophy, psychology, and alternative healing, practicing various yogas, working across diverse fields and traveling extensively in search of truth. Though deeply touched by India's spiritual richness, it was only upon meeting his guru in 2008 that his inner quest found its true home. Born and raised in the Italian Alps. He carries a deep connection to nature and people alike. Swami Aniruddha teaches in five languages across the world, always making spiritual knowledge accessible, transformative, and relevant to daily life. So welcome to the show.

Swami Aniruddha: 3:31

Thank you.

Katische Haberfield: 3:33

It is wonderful to have you here today, and I thought it was a perfect way because we haven't had a "Swami" on the show before to infuse the love and the energy into this podcast and your perspective on the world that you bring and that you see, and I have watched a few of your videos on YouTube now, and it, they always make me smile. The energy that you bring is really beautiful, so I've been enjoying watching those. Thank you. But I guess it would be wonderful to start with how did you, and I know it's one of those really big questions, but how did you get to where you are today to become a Swami? What, led you onto the path?

Swami Aniruddha: 4:18

What led me on the path like you said in the introduction, since small, I had this questions what life is about. I remember in elementary school, I asked the religion teacher, why am I, who am I who am I? And all those questions which people were just not able to respond to. And so the quest was always there. The inner quest was always there. What I was really looking for, I wasn't probably really aware of, but there was something I was looking for. And then, yeah, if you seek, you will find step by step. You meet different teachers, you get through different experiences, highs and lows things which will help you and things which will not help you. And yeah, more and more it brought me to like through different healing systems, through yoga then, because it's quite common nowadays. Yoga, meditation, pranayamas, and so on. Journey to India, traveling through the Indian subcontinent and reading about the life of the saints and hearing about the holy scriptures of different traditions, and especially then the Bhagavad Gita, which is one of the main Hindu texts. It just hit me and I noticed is actually finally something which talks about my quest and it gives answers to my quest and it treats of all those questions. And then I started to go deeper and deeper. Meeting many great souls, many spiritual teachers. And then, yeah, in 2008, finally I met my spiritual master Paramahamsa Vishwananda And with that kind of the journey, was finished journey started to go really deep myself and into this miracle of life and love in short.

Katische Haberfield: 6:32

Yeah. And did you find that when you were beginning this quest, when you were having these questions? It's not the average question that a lot of little children ask, is it's some of us have these questions from the beginning and it's a burning question and a burning drive, but at times you can feel a little bit strange. And thinking why, am I having these questions when everybody else doesn't seem to be having them? Or maybe only a few people. How did you find that inner courage to follow your questions and know that they were the right questions and not some diversion as one would say not going on the wrong path? I guess I'm asking this question because sometimes people do have these burning questions and they don't trust themselves fully to allow those questions to open the path and to lead the path. How did you know to follow those questions?

Swami Aniruddha: 7:29

I, think you mentioned a very important word of trust for sure. I have suffered a lot of lack of trust and fears and, just thinking that yeah that I'm weird or that like I probably for a long time, more than fear of death, there was a fear of life, like not knowing where to go, what to do, like whatever. I, wherever you go, whatever you do, yes it's doable. It's nice, but you never feel really at home. You never feel really as if you have arrived. And yeah, then there is moments where obviously you have those the first big love and whatever, there is moments where you feel a sense of having come home, but it's always just a small moment and, but this little taste of wellbeing. just so true and so real that you cannot deny it. even if you don't wanna follow it, it'll always catch up with you. And therefore it's a sort of grace. I would even say that luckily you cannot, you can't escape from yourself. You can run away from people, you can run away from jobs, from but you can't run away from yourself. And you may numb yourself to a certain extent that you not hear this inner a voice. But how long can you do it? And I would say it is really the grace which has kept on pushing me. And that's why I say that it's the great relief came when I finally found. A place and, people and a whole new universe of, world, which understood me and where I could understand, no it's not so out of order. It's not so abnormal to have these questions. It is something which many people have and which many people since immemorial had every great culture, every great, tradition has asked those questions, have touched the question of who are we? Why are we here? Be it the Greek, be the Indians, whatever, wherever you go. And then, yeah, the mind opens up when it obviously takes a bit of courage. But I think most of it is, grace. And yeah, it's not really a question of yes or no, it's just. destined for it. You're destined for it, and I think we all are. Sooner or later will have to follow the call.

Katische Haberfield: 10:26

Yeah. Sure, And how do you describe I could see it in your face, but that knowing when you, you found your tribe, so to speak, you found the people where you, that grace was around you all the time and you met the teachers that led you to your Satguru. Can you describe that for us a little bit more? And how did you know that for example I've read Diary of Yoga a yoga Indi and

Swami Aniruddha: 11:02

who, what, sorry? The autobi of

Katische Haberfield: 11:05

Yeah, that's right. Yeah. So I've, I, I have, I've read that recently and so I've understood his, progress and how he met different people and went through different challenges and, had different experiences. The journey of finding the right.

Swami Aniruddha: 11:24

I had goosebumps when you just mentioned that one.

Katische Haberfield: 11:25

Sorry. You had right? Yeah, so I was just trying, sorry. I was visualizing it in my head and trying to explain, how, for you, was it to find your teacher, your Satguru? How did you know? Was it like he, how he had that direct realization that he walked he came across him and then just felt that direct energy and he was like, this is my person. This is who's going to teach me what I need to teach. How did you experience it?

Swami Aniruddha: 11:55

no. I would say it is, it was a gradual process and there's obviously, now looking back, I can more clearly see the direct thread going through it because it is said, it's not that said that, it's not that you find the teacher, it's the teacher who finds you when you're ready.

Katische Haberfield: 12:14

Okay. Okay.

Swami Aniruddha: 12:16

So I was very much in like, I said, searching, going through different experiences. And I met many gurus when I was in, India. And they all played a big role in, in my life, but none of them was like, when I read the autobiography of Yogi, which you just mentioned, I came more and more across this principle of Satguru, because you see guru is also a word, which I want to expand a little bit because it's so important. Guru just means. There are two syllables, guru, which means darkness and rule, which means light. So it's the one who brings light into darkness.

Katische Haberfield: 13:04

Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 13:05

in the Indian tradition, every teacher is a guru, like you have a music teacher. He removes the ignorance of non knowing music

Katische Haberfield: 13:14

Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 13:14

and brings the knowledge of music. So he is a music guru.

Katische Haberfield: 13:17

Yep.

Swami Aniruddha: 13:17

and so you have many gurus on the physical level in many different places. And so also on the spiritual level, you can have many gurus, shishya gurus. They're gurus which teach you guru is the mother. Friends nature, life itself is a great guru, right? So I met many also great souls, realized souls and. I came more and more to this realization, to this understanding. The Satguru is one, sat means truth. So the Satguru is one. everybody has a Satguru.

Katische Haberfield: 13:55

Okay.

Swami Aniruddha: 13:55

It's the one who is said to lead you to the final destination you have many other gurus, but the Satguru is one.

Katische Haberfield: 14:03

Okay.

Swami Aniruddha: 14:03

So I heard about this principle and I understood it, but coming from the western tradition, also from very rational thinking, there's also a lot of, oh, be careful. Cults and brainwashing and there's, a lot baggage which comes along. And so there was this knowledge this curiosity, but also the fear and. So it was not like, oh yes, I want it. There's more always this idea of no, I am my own guru. I have to I have to reach and I have to achieve. When I, like I said, when I met my Satguru, for me it was not clear that he is the one, but something was clear that life has led me to encounter with him and that's the only thing I cannot deny. The people with me, they recognized something that something between us happened, but I was cautious. I had an interview with him with my mom and that first time in 2008 we met in, Assisi in the city of St. Francis of Assisi. I dunno if a very great Christian saint. There was an event where my teacher gave a blessing Darshan, and I came a day before. And so he gave a speech called Satsung. And after the speech he said whoever wants to have interview or wants to talk with me come, along. I was obviously very interested because so far I only met Indian teachers whom always needed translator, and I had a lot of questions, a lot of doubts, which I wanted to clarify. So when it was my turn to speak with him, immediately, the whole idea of the guru was broken because I have the idea of the guru the man with the long beard sitting in deep meditation in the Himalayas.

Katische Haberfield: 16:19

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 16:21

And basically at that time my guru was 30 years old. He was basically a young man joyful and easygoing, and he was like, chill.

Katische Haberfield: 16:36

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 16:36

You have questions, Come on, tell me.

Katische Haberfield: 16:39

Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 16:40

And so I said my first question, and he just looked deep in my eyes and said, listen to your heart. And I can tell you when I heard that, it was like, for me, it was like, I can do nothing with that. I need facts. I need some logical formula. Not listen to your heart. I have read that so many times. Give me something else, right? And then he gave me an answer and he ended the question again. The, answer. He ended again by looking and saying, and listen to your heart. So now I started to have more questions and every question I asked, he every time looked deeply in my eyes and said, and listen to your heart, gave an answer and ended and listened to your heart. And more, he answered more. I got confused because it's all my way, I created an idea of what life is and what spirituality is like. I made my, mixture, my, my construction, and in reality I didn't, have really questions. I wanted him to confirm my belief.

Katische Haberfield: 17:46

Yeah.

Swami Aniruddha: 17:46

There was still a form of doubt. Maybe I'm fooling myself,

Katische Haberfield: 17:49

Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 17:50

Maybe it's not a hundred percent right, what I'm thinking.

Katische Haberfield: 17:52

Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 17:53

He never denied it, but he also didn't confirm it. So that doubt started to become stronger. And the more I asked, the more I got confused. He always answered, listen to your heart, gave an answer, and then listen to your heart. In the end, it was steam coming out from my ears because I couldn't understand anything anymore. I felt like my whole life I built on a lie and I walked out of the room and I was feeling so bad. The next day when the blessing was about to be, I made myself a promise. I will never, ever speak to that person because he gave me so much time. I didn't really, you make good use of it. And in the end of the day, I feel so bad, so maybe it's better I don't talk with him. And then I went for the blessing. And after the blessing, really from within the heart there was. A question coming up. And the question which I uttered at that moment was, can you help me to follow my path? Because you see the question of what is my path? Where do I belong? The tribe, right? The tribe. What is your tribe? I was always, do I belong to this or do I belong to this? Should I follow this path or that path? Should I belong? Should I follow this path or that path? But the only one way I can be sure that I'm not one day waking up and thinking, oh, I served the wrong master, is my path Is the only path where I can be sure that's the right path.

Katische Haberfield: 19:29

Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 19:29

And. So I asked him, can you help me to follow my path? I don't know who you are for me. I don't know if you are a saint, if you are a guru, if you're my guru, if you are God incarnated or whatever, but life has brought me to you.

Katische Haberfield: 19:45

Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 19:47

can you help me? And that all Saints have come to this world to help us on our path.

Katische Haberfield: 19:53

Okay.

Swami Aniruddha: 19:53

So this is a question I can ask. You can say, no, nothing lost, or you can say yes, and at least I have somebody who can help me to follow my path. Because you have your relationship with God, you have your path. And so everybody who listens has their individual path, has their individual relationship with God. So I asked this question and he just looked at me with so much love and compassion and said, obviously, I will help you. then in the next moment, he became more serious he said, but listen to your heart. You got it finally. in that moment, I don't know what happened, but that whole. Fear, which I had what is about to come, the unknown future, the unknown life, which I was troubled to not have something to hold on instead of fear and worries, there was suddenly just so much trust and love that I'm guided, that I'm loved, that I'm that somebody is holding my hand some, everything is fine, just trust. And that feeling never left me since then. It was something which evoke within his grace and still there for me, it was not clear that he is the one, that feeling as it didn't leave me, I obviously wanted to investigate more. I wanted to deepen this knowledge, so I went to the monastery, to the ashram, and I learned the practices, the meditation techniques to, deepen the connection with myself. And yeah. And then everything took place, like between working on myself and just getting the clarity, became asking the right question, and especially listening properly. Because mostly the problem is not that we questions, the problem is that we don't listen because God speaks to us. We are just not always to listen. Because if he doesn't say what we wanna hear, then we don't listen. Yeah, by listening to that inner voice and to the clarity, it just became so obvious. And then it became, clear that he is, he's the one and yeah. That's now 17 years ago and I wouldn't want to miss one, one second. Would I have ever imagined that it leads me where I'm now? No. But it is the greatest adventure and it's beautiful.

Katische Haberfield: 22:26

Wonderful. And I think that that was really interesting in the way that developed for you in that it wasn't, the question ended up being, how can you help me find, follow my path? Because that's beautiful, because yeah, I just, I found that really insightful, really beautiful very, moving in that was the way that you, got that realization. You got the answer for yourself.

Swami Aniruddha: 22:53

Yeah. Because if you end undoubt about I think many people, everybody's looking for something. Everybody's looking in the end for themself for a higher purpose. In the end, for love, for wellbeing, which you can put it, harmony, family. You put it in what you want, but it's all contained in love. Right? And where do we find it? And we are looking always somewhere to find it. And, but it's never lasting. And the only, the moment it's, like when, I ask if I would've asked him, are you my spiritual master? Is this my path? And he says, yes. The first time I'm my mind and my ego is challenged and I doubt him. I will also doubt his words. So it's only, the only thing I can be sure that I don't wake up one day and feel I have served the wrong master, which can be a spiritual master, which can be a lifestyle, which can be a job one day. Yeah, one day is the last day. And then we will have a, looking back to our life, was it worth living? Did I really make the best out of it? Did I really make the best out of my life? Did I live. Fulfill the purpose of my existence or not to the best of my abilities. And so it's only when you, when it's connected with your truth that, when that day comes, that every day becomes that, that be death becomes your friend. And every day is a good day to live, and every day is a good day to die. It's just great.

Katische Haberfield: 24:42

Interesting because I think also one of the biggest fears that we have in the world, I would say, is that we are petrified of dying, right? Even the most spiritual or religious of us still seem to be afraid of dying, right? Because it's that question, have I done enough? Did I do what I came here for? Did I love enough? Was I enough? Where am I going to? I'm afraid that there will be nothing next, that I don't exist, that I that I miss the point that nobody will remember me. And there's that fear that we have to transform into love before we actually do finish in this suit that we have put on in this lifetime.

Swami Aniruddha: 25:33

Think there's, sorry to interrupt

Katische Haberfield: 25:35

no, you're right. Go.

SV Aniruddha BM: 25:38

There's, that's exactly the point, what you're saying. The question goes back to, am I because you, you said it in the end, suit I'm wearing. Who am I? Who is dying? And yes, it's easy to say, I am a spirit soul. I am a artman. I am, I'm not the body. I'm not, yeah, it's how many spiritual seekers say that, but exactly. When you're confronted with death, then the question am I just knowing it theoretically or am I knowing it? Because when you know it, there's no fear. All these questions which you have made, they answered in that question, who am I? When that question is answered from within, not up here, then all the fears are gone and because you know you are. I, you are enough. It's not something which you have to achieve even if you are not aware of it. the beauty of it. You are who you are. You have always been it, and you will always be it. are that spark, which is pure love. But yeah, it's nice words. It's nice words. It's like saying the honey is sweet and fruity. I want to taste it.

Katische Haberfield: 27:23

Yeah. Yeah. And how have you personally through your experiences at the ashram and in, in daily life how have you found things have helped you to come to the place where you are, feel that you're not afraid? Of what we just spoke of, not afraid of death and that you are love. Because I know for myself, it's still a continuing journey. All of the things we just said, I can intellectualize, I can rationalize but I still get to that point of fear I'm not I'm not there yet. I, can do things all the time and I can have glimpses of moments of, yes. In that moment I felt the presence and I felt that I was acting out of pure love. I was love, I communicated with love. I, was, my essence was love in that moment. But the other 97% of the life, it's like I might've been close, but I probably was pretty off. It's a work in progress, but it's that, yeah, the rest of that is the fear. And then you try and bring yourself closer each day to, the love. And It's like this magnet that you're like, have this internal struggle and all the fears and doubts come, and then you're like, oh, relief. And then you're in that moment of grace and that moment of bliss and that moment of love, and then you go back to normal life.

Swami Aniruddha: 28:40

Mm-hmm.

Katische Haberfield: 28:42

How have you dealt with that?

SV Aniruddha BM: 28:46

I think I'm absolutely with you. I'm not here to claim that my journey has finished. I'm still on the journey every day. I'm diving deeper into the truth we were just speaking about. but even being by ignorance from time to time doesn't change the truth. The truth, what you are is there, so the question is, how can I. Make the 99 or 97% of not being connected and turn, it upside down, make it more, 99% being connected and maybe just 1% not being connected. And that is where conscious spiritual journey is, important. A certain discipline is important. The right knowledge is important. Um, the association I keep is very important with whom I surround myself. And on top of everything, experience, it is the grace of the saints and the grace of, real spiritual masters like the, this knowledge and this experience, which we talked about it. I had it before I embarked on this path. glimpses, it's like you get a taste of it. Like you said, get a taste of it and you know it is real and you know it is worth living for that there's nothing in this world which can compare with it. Which can, yeah there's nothing higher than that. But the problem is, it's just, it's also just the taste. And then again, it's like the curtain opens, then it closes again, and then you're back into your gross identification with, wants and likes and dislikes and egoism and and anger and jealousy and whatever. All the different fluctuations and waves. How my, in my life I have just seen that. Yes, I have through. Through a spiritual path. I have a sacred knowledge from the ancient, like from the whole Indian tradition, from the yoga science and so on. This is eternal knowledge. It's like the Bava Gita. If you take the Bava Gita, the discourse between God and his disciple and the battlefield, that's the setting of thing. discourse is not as much it was written or it happened 5,000 years ago. It is, it is. theme today for everybody because he speaks about humankind about this inner journey. So having the right knowledge about what is right, what is wrong, knowing what is helpful, to get closer to that connection and knowing what is getting you further away, that helps you to use this instrument of intellect. Buddhi. In the Hindu tradition, it's called buddhi in a proper way. So that's a very important thing. So firstly, it's intellectual. You discriminate what is right, what is wrong, what is helpful, what is not helpful. Then there's obviously a spiritual practice which has either more strong impact or less strong impact. We just finished here in, in New York retreat the last few days with our teacher for we practice Kriya yoga, which Atma Kriya Yoga, which is a very ancient practice, it's literally called Atma Kriya means action, conscious action in the awareness of the self of the soul. So the more you practice those practices they, connect you always more with that essence. so the more you practice, the more you nourish, so to say that soul, that spirit, or however you want to call it, and the more obviously it grows and it becomes a living reality. So it is the knowledge, it is the practice, it is the company you keep. If you surround yourself with like-minded people, which uplift each and other, it's obviously helpful. on top of all of those things, I must really say it is the presence of my Satguru which has the capacity. As you have read, the Autobiography of a Yogi, you might have read that, that the difference between a teacher a guru and a Satguru is that the Satguru can give direct experience. I dunno if you have read the whole book, or I don't know if the listeners know the story, but by a mere glance, by mere touch, love can be awakened, that realization can be awakened. And the my first encounter with my Satguru was something like that where of no doing of myself, that trust, that confidence, that love was awoke or was awakened and it was just there. So it's grace and okay, I do my part, but I have, like it just said, 20% is in your hand and 40% teacher does for you. And the other 40% is pure grace. I don't need to bother about the grace because the grace does what it does. don't need to bother about what my teacher has to do because he knows what he has to do. I only need to bother about my 20%,

Katische Haberfield: 34:43

Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 34:44

But if I want a hundred percent, I need to do a hundred percent in my 20%,

Katische Haberfield: 34:51

Gotcha. Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 34:52

connected with to become a better version of myself, a better human being. Firstly having the right knowledge, the right practices, the right association, the right yeah. Lifestyle. then it gets nourished and it's then I feel like it becomes a life where if every day Carpe Diem if you, every day you live, like today is the last, because the facto is every day is your last. Nobody death is not sending us email and warning us

Katische Haberfield: 35:30

Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 35:31

It's not because you are old, you're dying. not because you're ill, you're dying any moment. This could be our last conversation and it was a pleasure meeting you, right? Live as if it's your last, like the Desert Fathers, they have lived the, they like Saint Anthony the great from the Desert Fathers. They were like saying, every day, am born in Christ. I live in Christ, and I die in Christ. And then I resurrect in Christ. You can't replace the word Christ for God, for love, for whatever you want, but live in that essence. Remember that essence, because that essence is always, it's you. You can't undo that essence who you are. Can never be undone. The love which you have experienced, this little taste, which sometimes reveals itself can never be undone. And that's the beauty of it. the beauty, that's the good news. You are love

Katische Haberfield: 36:40

And is.

Swami Aniruddha: 36:40

God is love, and your relationship with him is eternal.

Katische Haberfield: 36:46

Yeah, I think I found it very comforting. When you said you provided the framework and you said it's your responsibility to concentrate on the 20%, because sometimes we feel like we have to control a hundred percent and we can't. And that's the struggle that's the inner struggle, isn't it? Is that we're trying to con control the entire framework and we can't. And it can feel like you send yourself crazy, but it's also like giving yourself permission to let go of that 80% and concentrate on your 20%.

Swami Aniruddha: 37:14

well, and in, in the 20%. Make them step by step more and more, a hundred percent. Maybe today it's 1%, Okay. Try tomorrow to make it 1.5% or 2% right? And that starts by, is connected with your thoughts, with your words, and with your actions. And the most subtle to control is obviously your, thoughts. you want to live in love. Start up here. Do you love yourself? Do you love and accept yourself? What? What's the greatest commandment? Like I'm just using because you can see that the great master spoke of the same thing When Christ was asked, what is the greatest commandment of all? What did he say? Love your Lord with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength and love your neighbor as you love yourself. First, you have to love yourself. So if I'm seeing that I have deficiencies and I start to beat myself up and judge myself, and I'm such a loser and I'm so bad, does that bring me closer to self-love? No, it's not helping. So there is a change. How do you think about yourself, how you talk to yourself, how you treat yourself, because that will be a reflection, how you treat others in good and bad times. Because God loves us the way we are. He loves the greatest sinner more than the greatest saint can ever love him.

Katische Haberfield: 39:02

And we judge that, don't we? We are brought up to, to think that I can only speak for myself in the formative years, we can get influenced by the narrative that says you can only be loved if you're perfect. Do you know what I mean? There's these great big, long list of the ways that you should behave as a human. And if you, miss one of those lists of things, then you are not lovable, which is not what anybody's ever said, and it's not exactly, it's not what you just said, but it's that knowledge that no matter what happens to you or what you do, you are loved and lovable because you exist.

Swami Aniruddha: 39:42

Because you are love

Katische Haberfield: 39:43

Yeah.

Swami Aniruddha: 39:44

goes always back to who am I? The in the Sonata Dharma, which is essentially Hinduism. Hinduism is the wrong word, but that would open a hole. Another chapter, maybe another time. In this ancient tradition, it is said, what? What is the essence? What is the spirit? What is this soul? What you are? And it is, if we have to define it with words, which is obviously almost impossible, but they call it Sat Chit Ananda meaning existence, consciousness. bliss It's a conscious existence of bliss. That's what you are. That's, and everything what we do in life is just a conditioned expression of that, but that what you are is incorruptible. It can never be touched. there is a love when we speak about the external love. That's why in the Hindu tradition, they have even two words for love. There's the Piara which is an externalized love towards objects, towards things. And then there's Prema, which is the internal love, the essence of love. So the externalized is something which comes more from the mind, which is towards limited objects. Because in the outside everything is limited. Now everything which you can in the material world, you can see it has a beginning, it has an end. Yeah. As much as it might be beautiful as much, our relationship might be great. It is a love relationship is a partial expression of that inner love. the inner love, the of the essence, what you are, which is a part of past love God, that love has three qualities. It is eternal. It is ever-growing and there's nothing higher than it. So teacher often says when it's like, when. Have you been in love? Have you ever been freshly in love? So whoever has been freshly in love, how do you feel when you're in love?

Katische Haberfield: 41:50

Glowy, like just you glow you're, excited about life, everything sparkles.

Swami Aniruddha: 41:56

Everything,

Katische Haberfield: 41:57

Yeah.

Swami Aniruddha: 41:58

Like even if your boss is not nice, even if the weather is moody, doesn't matter because I am in love. bothers you, right?

Katische Haberfield: 42:08

Mm-hmm.

SV Aniruddha BM: 42:11

So imagine today you are in love, you're so mad about your beloved, and tomorrow you're more in love. And the day after you're more in love. And it's not that after three months or one year, you get bored or you get upset and he's bothering you with his boring jokes and with the noises, he or she makes no that for all eternity, that state of being in love keeps on growing and growing and growing and growing and growing for all eternity. How it is set to just get the taste of saying, okay, is life great when you're in love? Yes, life is great. can say that. If you have, if you're in love, life is great. The problem is only, it is a conditioned expression of love. And so if I get attached to that, I will get also the opposite side because it is not eternal and it's even mathematically clear. Because if you are like love, relationship always is composed of two. There's the object of love and the one who loves, right? So if the object of love is God, or this eternal ever growing love. And you are part, your soul is part of it. for the perfect object to be loved. Okay? So I don't know if you, follow me, like every lover looks for the perfect object to be loved.

Katische Haberfield: 43:53

Mm-hmm.

Swami Aniruddha: 43:53

So now how can something which is unlimited, meaning our essence, our soul, looks always for the perfect object of love in everything we are doing, it's basically an expression of ourself, of our soul. How can that ever be fully satisfied with something which is limited and conditioned? in the outside world, is just mathematically not possible. There will always be a catch. Why when you are, that's why love has different stages. Even in, in the Greek tradition now, they have the Eros, the philos and the agape like, different types where it's more sensual in the beginning maybe, and then it becomes more a platonic love and then it raises to a higher love where it's just, a connection which is deeper. It's not physical. It's not about the bodies, right? like this, what is love? But it always goes back, who am I? And if I come back to this essence of I am love that the essence of who I am is love. God is love, and I meditate on that. I bring this back to me, he loves you no matter what. Which doesn't mean you should become complacent, lazy, and indifferent. No. When actually when you remember the deep love, how much you really are loved. That feels like they're only motivated to become the better version of yourself because for that love, I will give you everything, isn't it? And to see this in other people, you see it, it the more you see it in yourself, the more you can see it in other people. And therefore it becomes something where in the partner, yes, I love the partner, but you, try to see the depth of what you really love. When somebody dies, you say the body of so. And I was once in, in Indiana in a monastery in the method, beautiful saint, and had a beautiful exchange. And in the end I wanted to take a picture with him, but I didn't have my phone and he didn't have a phone, so I was a bit sad about it. And he just looked at me and said, don't worry about the picture, you will lose or it'll break. love we shared will stay forever. And every time I tell this story, it's like he's right there love is and it's just increasing. The more we share it, the more it grows. And so how can we make this feeling what you said, which was like just maybe 1% more focus on it. Have your mind settled on that? Where is my mind going? Does it go towards the negative and towards the problems and judgment and so on the fears or do I direct it towards the positivity towards love? And that is where my 20% becomes important, where knowledge practice association and a right guidance can obviously is essential to get me closer and closer to directing my mind towards something higher. Not letting Beri down by my mind, because the mind is a very powerful tool. It is said in the Bhagavad Gita, in this ancient scripture that A controlled mind is your best friend. An uncontrolled mind is your worst enemy. It's not something which is new. We, know that. Experience that every day, but how can I make it my friend? How can I control It? That means a little bit of effort, a little bit of dedication, a little bit of willingness, and then there's grace.

Katische Haberfield: 47:48

Yes, indeed. I like that. So for people who are listening or watching, it's that, idea of. Helping your mind grasp onto that 1% of focus for how can I be loved today? So sitting with that intention in the morning for perhaps and you may have a very long to-do list of things to do be or whatever, but if you start with love, that will guide your day. Because I guess it's people who are listening to this might say, sure, I live in the real world and I can't be surrounded all the time by gurus and satgurus and I can't go to be ashram and I can't be in a perfect environment. But what you're saying is the truth of it, which was the question that I was gonna ask, is for us householders who live in daily life, it's about using the tools we have, which is our mind, which isn't in here, but it's here. And knowing that we can connect. With the essence of people who we have loved or have shown us loved or spiritual teachers, we don't have to be necessarily with them to experience that connection. And we can, if we're struggling with love. I guess what I'm feeling from what you said is that we can direct our mind to find the love, and perhaps it is taking your mind to that moment where you experienced that love from somebody who showed you who you were and you could feel your own essence and that grace. And then starting with that and saying, let that be my compass for today. Let that moment of love that I remember that moment of grace guide me today to be who I need to be so that I can be love. Would that be a good way to,

Swami Aniruddha: 49:37

You, absolutely you have. The point is you have a choice. I understand what you're saying, but the point is, household or not household or monk, we are all human beings And it, there's not really a difference. Obviously, there's a difference in intensity, how much you have dedicated your life to it, but in the end of the day, all have a choice. You can always see the glass half full or you see the glass half empty. Yeah. A simple example of when you say to people think positive, and I have heard people saying, ah, think positive. It would be so simple if it would be so simple that would be the solution. Have you tried it? Have you tried it? Waking up in the morning and saying, thank you for waking up, going and taking a shower and saying, thank you, that there's running water, on the light. Thank you that there's electricity. You see it is that men never have what they want because they don't want what they have. If they would like what they have, they would have what they want. And that would make you happy. That would make you appreciate, so appreciation is a very good tool to find more love, appreciation for everything, because like you said, holding on to the loved ones. Maybe I've lost a loved one, but maybe you can always look on the one I have lost or on the thing I have. Like you are blind on one eye. You complain that you only have one eye. Now you lose both now. Now you think, how beautiful was it when I had one? It's, really a choice. You can choose and, but you see this point of you can choose, this has nothing to do with a household or a monk or whatever. This is a human faculty, which we have been given. You can choose. point is people don't, sometimes people don't want to take that principle on it because that would mean, what would that mean?

Katische Haberfield: 51:51

It's their responsibility. They,

Swami Aniruddha: 51:53

exactly? You are responsible, you have the ability to respond. life. I have been, I have seen people like crippled and all in the worst situations and they kept a smile up. Like I bowed to them. Like they were not whatever. No. These are the inspirations. That's why we get inspired by those peoples who really are in difficulty, but they take on the inner fight because the inner fight is the greatest fight. The inner victory is the greatest victory. That's what the Bhagavad Gita is about. That's what those scriptures are about. That's what it's all about. And that doesn't matter if you are a monk, if you're a household, that's a human being the situation. You have the choice. You have the choice and you can grow more you become responsible. Also what falls away is the role of a victim. you become responsible, you can't be anymore blaming everything around you for your misery. And that is a great freedom. But again, it needs a willingness to really want to change. that's what I mean, if you really want to change there is ways, there are available for everybody in, this path. Like I followed the path of Bhakti yoga, Bhakti Marga, which is the path of loving devotion. Yeah. That path is not separated from the normal world. Most of the people who follow this path, they are normal people with family, with jobs, with everything. I see them the first time. They maybe have a depressed face. I see them again after meeting a teacher after applying the wisdom to their life. And I see some sparkling in their eyes and I'm like, what did you do? Did you change job? No. Did you change your, place to live? No. Did you change partner? No. Did you give away your children for adoption? I don't know. What, did you do? No, outside. I didn't change anything. I changed inside something. And that's something we all can do. If somebody has more practice, somebody has less practice, but we have to start somewhere. It's not important where you are. If you have half a percent or 1% or 99% of your 20% sorted out, it doesn't matter. But start somewhere with positive thinking, with clinging on to the what you have, being grateful. And then there is, for example, a very simple practice, which I can if you want, I can share here, which is the chanting of mantras. Mantras are sacred syllables, which have, which carry a great vibration, a transformative vibration, which help to calm the mind and open the heart. And that's something everybody can do anytime, while you're cooking, while you're driving, while you're showering, while you are in the middle of a dispute with somebody in your mind, you can keep on going with the mantra, which is calming you down, washing you, and getting and more in resonance with your essence. Because those mantras they have. Yeah. The vibration goes in resonance with your true self and more and more you feed it. So by practicing it, it's like doing workout.

Katische Haberfield: 55:28

Okay. Yeah.

Swami Aniruddha: 55:29

run, you can't make Iron Man if you have not trained. if every day you do a little bit, you will start to become stronger. So those who are interested, my guru has given the mantra. Sri Vitthala Giridhari Parabrahmane Namaha. I will send it to you if you want to

Katische Haberfield: 55:49

Thank you. Yes.

Swami Aniruddha: 55:51

And there's also tons of links, where the song and where it means in essence, my obedience to the supreme love, which pervades everything, which is the protector, sustainer, and loving servant of all. In short, it has obviously much more depth of it. It's, don't want to go too much into that, but that's a treasure which. I can freely give. And if you really apply it, yeah it's, like the medicine. If you have headache and you have an ibuprofen on your next to your bed, if you don't take it, it will not help. But if you take it, you will see it has an effect. The same is with those mantras. This is one mantra which you can do. Sri Vitthala Giridhari Parabrahmane NamahaIa. I invite you, just practice it, let it run till you got it, and then see how it calms your mind and how it opens your heart. And this connect it with the positive thinking, with the gratitude, with the right knowledge, with maybe some other practice, with remembering your loved ones, with remembering all of those things. They bring more and more light and love into your life. It's your responsibility. It's your choice. To some extent. To some extent, always to some extent, we are limited. After all, we are conditioned after all. if every day we do a little step, then we will have a fulfilled life. It's when we don't even try or give up before we even started and,

Katische Haberfield: 57:41

Perfect. Thank you. And so I will put, I will get that mantra and then I would suggest. People write it out. And then they can stick it in front of them when they're cooking or whatever, so they can read it until it,

Swami Aniruddha: 57:56

there's tons of I sent you YouTube links like my, my, my brother, he is, he's a monk also, but he had a past off dj. So he make all

Katische Haberfield: 58:06

okay.

Swami Aniruddha: 58:06

music with the mantra behind. So it's like even modern music with the mantra so you can listen to it and just have it in the background running. And also will just help you because these are all influences which can either uplift you or drag you down. There's the more you go into that science, the more you can see how everything has an influence on us. Start on the most obvious ones, right?

Katische Haberfield: 58:37

Yeah, exactly. And as people who listen to this know it's, the words aren't just words, it's the sound vibration and the vibration is the energy. And just by playing it or speaking it, your, your changing your frequency and the energy around you and that helps you with your thoughts anyway. So it's very powerful.

Swami Aniruddha: 59:01

Absolutely.

Katische Haberfield: 59:01

So I just wanted to really thank you very much, very grateful for your time today, Swami. And is there anything else that you would like to, say as a parting words, or would you just like to leave it at that?

Swami Aniruddha: 59:16

I think I just leave it at that with once more, the invitation. Take it in your hand. Don't, fall into your weakness. Find your strength and yeah, practice those things. What we talked about it, you will see. Whatever. Wherever you are, your life will improve and the light which increases in you will a guiding light also for the people around. And that is most necessary in this world that we all become, this shining light is love and bring it to the world. If you're interested in my path, in the teachings of my teacher, of my guru, you're most welcome to follow them. They're online. There's tons of material on bhaktimarga.org. If you want to put it, you can put it. There's speeches and there's tons of material. If you want to connect, everybody is most welcome to cherish from this wisdom, from this ancient wisdom. Wisdom. And yeah, take whatever is needed for your path. And I pray that all of you who listen, find the true love within, find yourself and find your relationship with.

Katische Haberfield: 1:00:33

Thank you. Thank, you very much. And I know I say namaste, but you say something different, so I'll say namaste.

Swami Aniruddha: 1:00:39

is good. I

Katische Haberfield: 1:00:40

Yeah.

Swami Aniruddha: 1:00:40

in our tradition, we say Jai Guru Dev, which means glory to the divine teacher, which is obviously the external teacher, but it's also the internal teacher, divine teacher, which is within, and the divine teachers, which are around Jai Guru Dev. But Namaste is fine as well. That's the, it's just a way of so small things where you can help yourself to remind yourself of that love, of that light, of that divinity. Also, Namaste means basically that.

Katische Haberfield: 1:01:13

Okay, and thank you for your time today.

Swami Aniruddha: 1:01:16

Thank you. Thank you very much.